When I was growing up I never had a doubt that my grandmother loved me. I knew it for sure because any negative emotion of the shame of not being the most popular girl in school was filled nicely with Grandma’s desserts.
A weekend at Grandma’s house filled with baking and eating oatmeal cookies and all the other great food from the farm, helped numb any pain I had from a sometimes stormy and turbulent home life. It also filled the vacant hole that screamed, “Does anybody really love me?”
By the time I was in high school, I was a slave to comfort foods, sugary bready desserts, floured meats with gravies, hoecake, fried chicken, fresh fruit pies, hot rolls and Grandma’s mashed potatoes. I still lived for the weekends at Grandma’s because she would cook all my troubles away with her overload of sweetness.
The Real World
Stepping out into the real world on my own is where my weight began to be a problem. After getting married, I really didn’t care about managing my weight. I mean, I got my man, right?
Grandma said, “Feed your husband three good meals a day,” so I did. I just seemed to still be cooking for a family of five like we had at home. My husband has always eaten until he is full and stopped, but it was like I had no shut off valve where things I loved to eat were concerned.
Since I was in charge of that area of our lives, I cooked what I loved and for the first time in my life found myself over 200 pounds and headed to 250.
Move My Mountain of Flesh
I still remember the exact place I was sitting at the kitchen table of our apartment, sun streaming through the East window. I was reading the story about the demon-possessed boy that the disciples couldn’t heal.
When they asked Jesus why they couldn’t drive the demon out, He answered, “Because of the littleness of your faith; for truly I say to you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you,” (Matthew 17:20 NASB).
In my journal, I wrote, “God, I have a mountain of flesh on my body. How can THAT be moved?”
He clearly said to me. “Stop eating sugar. Eat more meats, fruits and vegetables. Stop eating so much bread.”
I Can’t Do That
This was God’s good plan to secure my future, but my response was. “Great plan, God. If I could do that, I would lose weight. But I can’t do that. So how about I go on just go a diet?”
I heard His voice. I knew it was Jesus talking to me, so He knew me, but unlike the advice in John 10:27, I didn’t follow Him. I didn’t do what He said. I decided to take matters into my own hands and for the next 30 years wandered in the land of food addiction.
God had asked me to surrender sugar completely. I didn’t even entertain the thought. I just turned off His voice. Every time when I’d get back to that place of weight despair and cry out to God, He’d give me the same plan. He was very consistent.
My Surrender Moment
I wish I could say it didn’t take long for me to come to my senses, but that would be an out and out lie. It took me coming to the bottom of myself before I could even think about giving up the foods that seemed like the only thing holding me together.
It took the right person saying the right words to me at the right time to help me understand that I am a sugar addict. I am like an alcoholic only with sugar. Understanding the gravity of that fact is what finally brought me to my knees in surrender to my God.
This is really stage two in the Success Path to Transformation. It’s the stage we all have have to go through before we can begin to change our lives. It’s the most difficult and most freeing stage of them all.
From High to Low
The surrender process is where we go from the high (in stage one) of dreaming about what we want to happen to falling headlong to the bottom of ourselves when we realize there is no way we can reach our dreams, no way we can move our mountain, by ourselves.
We need Jesus. We need the Spirit of Christ guiding us. We need to surrender the things we’ve been holding on to tighter than Him. We need to give up.
In surrender, relinquishing of all the things we have felt we had a right to consume, comes freedom from the bondage of sugar and comfort food addiction.
What God Was Saying
This is what God had been saying to me all those years ago. He had a good plan for my life but I wouldn’t even think about why He might want to “restrict” me.
Could it be that He wanted to be my everything instead of something so childish as candy, cookies, cakes, pies, brownies and hot rolls? Could it be that God loves me enough to gives me boundaries to save me from myself?
When I finally made that step of surrender, everything changed. I didn’t automatically give up sugar, but I had the desire and drive to learn how to make that happen. We’ll talk about this more in stage three where we learn to walk out the journey.
If you really want freedom from your bondage to food, run, don’t walk, to find out about my all-new Overcomers Christian Weight Loss Academy. So much is going on over there that’s it’s hard to describe everything.
Suffice to say that we’ve got enough courses to keep you busy for quite awhile, but we don’t just throw you in the midst of them to try and figure out where to go or what to do.
We also have a private Facebook Group where we give you encouragement, support and guidance as we go through the courses together, one lesson a week.
On top of that, we have a live, monthly video call where you can ask me any question. I coach you to victory or at least give you some suggestions to help you on your journey. The monthly calls alone are worth exponentially more than the price of the group.
Overcomers Academy is not open right now, but you can read all about it and sign up on the waitlist to be notified when the group opens again. Heres’s the link: https://teresashieldsparker.com/overcomers-christian-weight-loss-academy/
In the meantime, if you want one-on-one coaching check HERE for availability.