I was sitting at the kitchen table in our small two-bedroom apartment. My husband had just left for work. The sun was streaming through the east-facing picture window.
My Bible was open to the book of Matthew. My journal was ready and my pen was in my hand. Then, I glanced over at the three remaining cinnamon rolls from those I had baked that morning.
Before starting my time with God, I decided to fill my stomach again. Surely God wouldn’t mind. I grabbed the rolls and a diet cola to wash them down and started reading in Matthew 17. It was when I read Jesus’ answer to His disciples that God’s flashlight illuminated the passage and the words went straight to my heart.
Jesus replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” (Matthew 17:20 NIV)
I Have a Little Faith
As thoughts coursed through my mind, I began writing. “God, I have a little bit of faith. I also have a mountain of flesh on my body. How can this mountain be moved?”
To put things in perspective, it was 1977 and I weighed over 200 for the first time in my life. I was headed towards 250 and I didn’t like it. Still, I loved cinnamon rolls, cookies, cakes, rich casseroles, hot rolls, chips and so much more.
Jesus didn’t answer my question in an audible voice but in the sense of knowing deep in my heart and soul. I know the answer was straight from Him because it is not an answer I expected, had ever heard anywhere before or had ever thought about.
Stop Eating Sugar
I wrote what He said in my journal. “Stop eating sugar. Eat more meats, fruits and vegetables. Stop eating so much bread.”
I didn’t have to stop and think about what I did next. I wrote my answer to Him, “Nice plan, Jesus. If I could do that, I could lose weight, but I can’t do that.”
I didn’t ask Him if He could help me with this plan. I didn’t tell Him I’d think about it. I didn’t decide if He was telling me to do this, He must have a reason. I simply said, “I don’t need Your advice, after all, Jesus.”
I didn’t want to give up sugar. I didn’t think I should have to give up sugar forever. I knew the Bible well enough to know as a Christian I am free to do whatever I want and if I want to eat sugar, then I’m going to eat sugar. Nowhere in the Bible does it say, “Thou shalt not eat sugar.”
The Sugar Conundrum
The conundrum I found myself in, though, was I wanted to lose weight and I knew eating too many foods containing processed sugar was one of my biggest problems. Still, I didn’t want to give up those foods completely. More emphatically, I was sure I couldn’t give them up. They were too intertwined with who I was.
For the next 30 years, I tried to lose weight by finding diets that curtailed sugar and most breads, and focused on protein, meat, vegetables and fruits. On those diets, I could lose weight, but I never learned anything about how to change my lifestyle. I’d stay on the diet until I got to a goal. Then I’d celebrate by baking one of Grandma’s delicious oatmeal cakes and eating as much of it as I wanted.
Doing this meant I would go off the diet and gain the weight back plus more. One bite of any concoction that contained processed flour and sugar would mean I would go back to the way I had always eaten.
Jesus, You’re Mean to Me!
The plan Jesus gave me felt like He was being mean to me. Why could I not eat sugar? Others could eat it and not gain an ounce. Life was not fair.
He made Himself clear and plain to me on that day. It’s a day I will never forget. It’s the day my loving Jesus gave me a lifestyle change plan designed especially for me, but I thumbed my nose at Him and walked away. Even by this time eating sugar had become more important to me than following Him. I had no clue I would become more than twice the size I was then before I finally implemented His plan.
I didn’t know I was already living a lie. It was a lie that affected my entire life—spirit, soul and body. My soul is made up of my mind, emotions and will. Those contain my thoughts, feelings and desires which were all involved in helping me believe the lie I needed sugar to survive.
I was programming my body to want more sugar. If I’d been in my right mind and thought about it logically, I would see eating sugar was not good for me. I was gaining weight, taxing my body and setting myself up to develop diabetes, high blood pressure and many other diseases
I was denying the Holy Spirit access to all of me. I was choosing to allow a different spirit to control this one area of my life. I was blinded by a lie I had allowed to grow into a stronghold. I had certainly fed it often enough.
Is Overeating a Sin?
When I asked Jesus how to move my mountain of weight, it wasn’t because I was convicted it was a sin. It was because I saw my weight as an inconvenience. Plus, I didn’t want to look like a fat blob. My reasons for wanting to lose weight were purely selfish as were my reasons for eating whatever I wanted whenever I wanted it.
I’m surprised Jesus even answered such a selfish prayer. He answered, though, because He had a vested interest in what I was doing to myself. He gave me the right answer, I just didn’t realize the depth of the question I had asked.
If I had known then what would eventually happen to me, all the difficulties, missed opportunities, pain and disease I had opened the door to, maybe I would have listened to Him. Sometimes, though, the best lessons are learned through experiencing our failures and brokenness.
To get through this, I was going to have to admit my weakness and rely on real strength, the strength that only comes from God. I was going to have to stand on and understand that when I am weak in human strength, only then am I strong, truly powerful, truly drawing from God’s strength as it says in 2 Cor. 12:10 AMP.
For more on this topic, listen to episode 121 of Sweet Grace for Your Journey podcast, Real Strength. https://Teresashieldsparker.com/podcast/
Teresa Shields Parker is a Christian weight loss author, coach, podcaster, and speaker, who has lost 250 pounds and kept it off since 2013. Her books include: “Reconnecting Jayne: Her Sister’s Support,” “Rebuilding Jayne: Her Father’s Protection,” “Sweet Grace: How I Lost 250 Pounds and Stopped Trying to Earn God’s Favor,” “Sweet Grace Study Guide,” “Sweet Victory: Winning the Battle,” “Sweet Surrender: Breaking Strongholds,” “Sweet Journey to Transformation: Practical Steps to Lose Weight and Live Healthy”, “Sweet Freedom: Losing Weight and Keeping It Off With God’s Help,” “Sweet Freedom Study Guide,” “Sweet Change: True Stories of Transformation,” “Sweet Hunger: Developing an Appetite for God,” and “Sweet Excuses: Stop Lying to Yourself & Start Losing Weight.” She also offers Overcomers Christian Weight Loss Academy and VIP intensive coaching. Don’t miss her weekly podcast, Sweet Grace for Your Journey, where she shares tips from her personal journey of losing weight and discovering healthy living. Contact her at [email protected].